Tackling my Fear of Trying New Things

I am sure no one is shocked to hear that I have tried new things while living abroad. And while yes, I have tried new food, new clothes, new music, I have also tried a lot of things I wasn’t anticipating. I tried archery; I joined a photography club; I started reading Harry Potter. Now you might be thinking, “Lucy, you could’ve done all of that at home in the US.” And you are correct. But what I think one of the most amazing parts of exchange is, is that you have room to change.

At home, I was on a tight schedule 99% of the time. My life was filled with homework, swimming, church, and, if I had time that week, reading. I am not saying any of this was bad (excluding homework), but my routine lacked diversity. There was no time to go out on a limb and try something new. I couldn’t afford to miss any of the things I was “good at” to try potentially fail at something new.

Now obviously, this all changed when I moved to Germany. I no longer had any real schedule or activities, and I was failing at everything. And so, my ego vanished. I no longer had any sort of persona or reputation to keep up with, so I just dove headfirst into life.

I started speaking German, even when it was messy and probably made my entire host family cringe. I went to archery lessons, and even though they turned out not to be my thing, now I know that I have horrendous aim! I started introducing myself to kids at school, even when they would straight up ignore me sometimes (yes, it happened once or twice).

I am still not perfect, and I still want to crawl back into my comfort zone a lot of the time, but it’s not really an option here. While you have lots of room to change on exchange, there is not so much room to stay the same. The safety net of familiarity that has existed for my entire life has vanished, and I’ve only got one chance at this. While that might seem sad, I think it’s also encouraging. I only have one go at this year, so I might as well give it my all.

I think the coolest interest of mine that I’ve explored this year is photography. I have never considered myself a particularly artistic or creative person. I am completely tone-deaf, and my art projects haven’t improved since Kindergarten, but even if I am not great at it, I really enjoy photography. I like to capture little moments and hold on to them forever.

Since coming to Deutschland, I have taken photos of everything. Seriously, I am patiently waiting for the “iCloud full” message. A few weeks ago I joined the “Fotograffiern Extraklasse” at my gymnasium in an attempt to make new friends. After attending the first club meeting, I learned that really only younger kids (I’m the oldest there by a good three or four years) attend. I thought about quitting, but I changed my mind. I am just going to explore this interest with no expectation of success and comparison to others, who cares what the other fifth graders think!

So I guess all I am trying to say is, trying new stuff is cool and a little scary, and I am thankful for all the opportunities I’ve had so far this year.

Until next time,

XOXO Bookish Babble